Trumpitis is a Real Sickness

There’s a new sickness in town and it’s called Trumpitis. It is comorbid with OWPS, Old-ass White People Syndrome. The symptoms include extreme denial, high blood pressure and racing pulse. Patients are predominantly white, over 50 and really fucking grouchy. This syndrome works by enlarging the Amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for emotion, and making it self-aware. The Amygdala then takes over the brain, overriding the ability of the patient to process information.   

Trumpitis affects selective audial processing as well as vocalization and

Policy is Hard Y'all

cognition. The auditory cortex experiences a reduced ability to hear and process points of view that differ from one’s own.  The hearing mechanism itself is not affected, but the auditory cortex s blocked by signals emanating from deep inside the brain. The Amygdala screens for key words such as “compassion” or “fairness” and blocks those signals from being processed by the brain. Conversely, phrases such as “send them all home” “Muslims are evil” and “Obama is a Socialist” pass unmolested. Also, Benghazi.

Trumpitis also causes the volume of the voice to increase to uncomfortable levels. This is known as “shoutiness.” This shoutiness drowns out everything and everyone within earshot. When the afflicted person believes they are losing an argument, or the cerebral cortex cannot process and argument, the brain issues a retort, typically a non-sequitur, at a massive sonic volume. The syndrome tricks the brain into thinking that the volume of the voice is more important than the

You go girlfriend!

words being said.

There is no cure for Trumptitis. Whereas many other Socially Transmitted Diseases can be cured through education, this disease causes a patient to eschew science or reason, and to consider any academic to be a pointy-headed leftist homo-monkey. Sadly, if left unchecked Trumpitis can spread globally. Unlike Putinosis, Trumpitis is airborne and non-specific in it’s propagation.

To stop its spread, we must be vigilant no matter your party affiliation. Every time someone tells you a “fact” you must counter with the real fact. Show them the science.  Show them the Trump bankruptcy filings. Talk about how character counts and then count the number of wives Trump has had. It’s up to us.