Decide Already!

My brilliant niece recently wrote a piece on her blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat relating her night of trolling on various mommy sites. Her posts skewered what she termed as first world problems  like whether to use a coupon or not, etc. --  the kind of problems that are probably not being felt in places like Syria, or Malawi. What I noticed in the posts was a  troubling inability to MAKE A FUCKING DECISION! Each author was looking for an electronic hand to hold before leaping off the cliff. The problem is that these were routine decisions, the kind people used to make without hesitation.   


However, the authors thought they were life changing events. Call Sigmund Freud, I can't decide whether to go to Old Navy or The Gap!! 

Freud says:
Make a Fucking Decision!!!

This isn't just evident in the mommy forums. Even the super-butch Harley forums provide an arena for the gladiatorial hyperbole of the fucking morons that inhabit the web. There are endless discussions about the right cam/head/valve combination and constant hang-wringing about whether they made the right choice in buying their cylinder heads off EGay. They split hairs in a game of mental masturbation that would make Aquinas want to hit them with a tire iron.


It's a fact of life everywhere. America has become the land of "consensus" where no one makes a decision anymore, we wait until everyone weighs in and then decide. Or we make no decision and let someone else do it for us. Immature infantiles  looking for mommy to decide for us. 

Fuck that! 

Y U No Open?

There are a whole lot of people out there who can't figure out how to open a pickle jar let alone make actual decisions.  It's a damned disease. There's a fine line between asking for advice and being neurotic


My theory is that people are afraid to make a mistake or fail. Their consensus-seeking behavior is a mechanism whereby they can spread the blame if everything goes to shit. 


Except no one takes the  blame. Usually the person who fucks it up says things like:

"Laying the blame is counterproductive."

"We need to move forward not backward"

I'm in Hell!!!

Of course you would say that you fucktard. You're the one who screwed it up. Over time, everyone in the group screws something up and they all know each other's secrets so they have to stick to their hellish playgroup as if they were playing in No Exit. They hold it over each other in a game of Mutual Assured Destruction played out in Dockers and ill-fitting golf shirts. 


No choice is perfect. Like blog posts, there will be good and bad.  Freedom breeds anxiety. Erich Fromm and Devo aptly pointed out the paradox of choice. But the neuroses that paralyzes people today is different, it's not just about making the right decision, it's an adolescent attempt to accumulate peer approval. 


Hmmm should I post this or not?


What do you think?