America's Masculinity Crisis

I'm not the most macho dude out there, I'll admit it. I've tried, but at 5'6" and 175lbs, I cut a more compact athletic figure than that of your typical white male. I grew up in a town where the worst epithet anyone could hurl at you was fag. It was the kind of town where being a good fighter was revered more than being the quarterback of the football team. No one wanted to fight me, I was a science nerd, band geek and drama jock,  so kicking my ass would be akin to hunting three-legged sheep. That doesn't mean I didn't sleep with one eye open so to speak.

I thought that life after high school would be different, that once we age, we would mellow. Oh how I was wrong. The White America Male (WAM) has actually regressed to a point of silly macho viciousness. Challenged in his exalted place by women, minorities, homosexuals and other formerly marginalized exotica, he seeks out a new definition of masculinity based in old myths and half-truths. Those mythical tenets now guide their lives and actions contributing to a toxic stew of resentment, pettiness and downright hate.

I've observed that the new macho dude falls into one of three categories; the Tough Guy (TG); the Westerner (W) and the Southern Fried Redneck (SFR.) While each archetype is influenced by regional differences, you can find any of these creatures in any part of the country, or the world for that matter.

What are you lookin' at?

The Tough Guy's range encompasses the Noretheastern US,  south to Baltimore, west across Chicago and to Omaha and as far south as Kansas City.  The TG is a mix of street tough attitude, flinty and squinty stares and itchiness. He parses every glance and eye contact and is willing to fight at the drop of a hat. Look at him the wrong way and he's ready to throw down. Alcohol only exacerbates the problem. For the Tough Guy, life is a series of dog eat dog encounters and compromise is appeasement. TG's believe might makes right and that proclaiming any sort of sensitivity or empathy is tantamount to being a fag. Why you might as well be Caitlyn Jenner if that is the case.

The Westerner's range spreads across the western US from Omaha to Spokane, down the eastern side of the pacific Northwest and California across Arizona and New Mexico to West Texas. The Westerner is a hard scrabble man, who loves Jesus (although he hasn't read the bible) fears God and believes that America is under attack from a secret Muslim Fifth Column. To them, Obama in the White House is a clear sign of the end of times, and that America will be the only country God will allow to survive. They base their beliefs in a weird Christianity where Jesus doesn't turn the other cheek, he pulls out a Kimber .45 and blasts away. He's highly suspicious of anyone that isn't white or may be perceived as "different." The Westerner believes that anyone can pull them selves up through hard work and that the government only reinforces bad choices by providing any type of safety net. Also, the government is a Zionist plot.

PTL and pass the ammo

Finally, the archetype that is sweeping the country is the Southern Fired Redneck. Typified by maroons such as Toby Keith, Charlie Daniels and Mike Huckabee, the SFR portrays the most flamboyant form of macho this side of the Village People. Until recently, the range of the SFR was bounded by the South and Texas. Currently, the SFR can be found anywhere. They are easily recognized in their jacked up trucks with various stickers on the back proclaiming their hatred for the government, Obama, welfare, and love of hunting. They sport their goatees and baseball caps advertising their favorite gun brand, along with their ballistically impenetrable  wraparound shades. They're a paranoid lot who see"threats' around every corner and believe America is the chosen land of God that was founded on the Bible and that Jesus was an American. They hold Red Dawn-based dreams of an invasion by Muslims or FEMA so that they can yell "Wolverines" and repel the invaders like their forefathers.

For all of these archetypes, talk is cheap and thinking is for pussies, action is where it's at. They like strong forceful leaders who don't hesitate to use violence to fix a problem. They hold diametrically opposed views that when highlighted are dismissed with "that's your truth." In short, they are a bundle of ignorant, ill-informed contradictions and I fear it will only get worse.